I had many different feelings, some sad but some even really angry. 'Send back all the photos of you I printed so carefully, saying, give these to your next conquest!' These were not charitable thoughts however, so I abandoned them pretty qucikly.
But part of me is angry at myself for letting me get into this situation so easily. Totally seduced at someone's funeral, by the actual person who was grieving! How stupid is that! But of course I felt sorry, as well as lustful, for this beautiful Asian man who came onto me as though I were the man he'd been waiting for. And eventually I actually thought he was the one I had been waiting for.
Emotions are fickle, and life deals blows to the unitiated that are hard to recover from. But of course I am recovering and writing this post is part of that. I feel for Y, that although he spent two years caring for and waiting for his lover to pass on, he wasn't able to accept the fact that now he is free to find another person he has the total blessing of his former lover. But he can't, and that's the sad reality for me.
What can one say? Grieving needs a lot of time and I said when I met him he needed twelve months to sort himslf out. And I'm sure he does. But will I be still there in the wings waiting? I doubt it. I have learned a lesson and it is one that has come to me before - stop being the saviour and get on with my life. It was good he realised early he had made a mistake before my emotions were totally in chaos.
In the end I must say I am extremely happy that this quick and passionate affair has resulted in me staying in this wonderful town, and Memphis is always there for me - no worries!
Front page footy drama, normal...
....a tent city to buy tickets, back in the days
The music is loud, as always, but changing constantly, and stimulating the baristas to keep on top of their job serving some of the best coffee in Wellington, which is the acknowledged coffee capital of New Zealand, if not the Southern Hemisphere. The coffee, coupled with the variety of great music, makes this cafe such a welcoming place to be every morning, and the sight of all their faithful customers is always a delight to witness. Viva Memphis!
'I won't forget to put roses on your grave!' belts out on the sound system. Poor Yono!
OZ pays up for abuse, but more to go..
Russian astronaut in the clouds..
Young Rugby talent always there
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